What are you lot so pleased about?

Well, George Orwell put it best in Animal Farm. "Some animals are more equal than others."

They are all pleased because we are all paying.

They are all pleased because they will achieve the square root of fuck all at yet another global boondoggle, but they won't have to face the consequences.

Berlusconi is extremely pleased because he should have been in jail years ago for being funded by the Mafia but like his friends Andreotti and Craxi he's managed to rig the system so he'll never get locked up.

Brown is pleased because he thinks sticking his tongue up Obama's arse will make people take him seriously. Silly bugger.

Merkel is either grinning out of embarrassment at being sat next to two such ghastly plonkers or with delight because Silvio has just offered to give her a blow job.

Sarkozy is grinning because he won't have to.

And of course they are all as happy as Larry because they don't have to worry about how to pay the mortgage or who's going to fund their pensions - and they have absolutely no shame.

Incidentally, reverting to our Home Secretary's wanky husband, serious questions of principle have been raised in our office.

Why did he waste £10 of taxpayers' money on two videos? For about the same price he could have downloaded oceans of filth for a whole month. Does living with a politician lead to stupidity by association?