What a nasty, suspicious, curmudgeonly, hypercritical old git I am

I don't know what comes over me some of these mornings. Maybe it's a light coating of imaginary volcanic ash.

Why do I doubt the promise of Rocketfish that they will "Launch (or blast) Drayton Bird Partnership website into first place!"?

Is it because they keep sending me the same message every bloody day, which bespeaks a certain lack of imagination - or a belief that boredom is the key to persuasion? Is it because names like Rocketfish summon up visions that make me puke?

Or maybe it's because this sort of claim must work, so quite a few mugs out there must fondly dream that being in first place will solve all their problems, when of course many other things matter more.

Or is it just that since the Drayton Bird Partnership hasn't traded for quite a few years they must be utterly useless and are wasting my time and their money? If they can't get that right, why should I trust them to do something serious?

Then again, why do I have qualms about a Mr. Grant who keeps sending me messages about the joys of crowd conversion? Is it just that he keeps pestering me too often? Or it is because if he spells controversial as contraversial I wonder what else he isn't good at?

The head of a big airline suggested some years ago that if the seat-back trays are dirty you have a lingering fear that the same approach is applied to servicing the engines. Hmmm.