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Tuesday 6 December 2011

At last! One of my favourite jokes brought to life by a rip-off specialist -- or maybe he's a philanthropist. What do YOU think?

By the time you read this I'll be winging my way across the Atlantic to sighs of relief here in the U.K. and moans of apprehension in the New York area.


A few moans from me, too, because when I see my son Phil I tend at some point to end up in a grand Irish bar in Soho the name of which always escapes me, but for some reason I think it's Italian.

Here's the joke, anyhow.

A researcher is asking a number of men (I have no idea why they were there) about their sex lives, and specifically how often the happy event occurs. "Who gets it every day?" he asks. Two raise their hands with smug grins. "And every other day?" Five happy souls raise their hands. "Once a week?" Fifteen, not quite so cheerful, confess to this.

And so it goes. As the intervals get greater, the happiness diminishes, until the researcher asks "Once a year?"

One little man man in the back row sticks his hand up, grinning all over his face.

"Well, you seem quite content," says the researcher.

"Tonight's the night!" cries the little man.

All this came back when I got an email from Steve Little with that very heading. He promises "a simple, easy to follow formula you can steal that is guaranteed to produce income for you" - and lots more in the same vein.

This reminds me of a story about the Duke of Wellington, then by far the most famous and recognisable person in England and perhaps Europe.

A man came up to him and asked, "Are you John Smith?"

"If you believe that you'll believe anything," replied the Duke.

The same I suspect applies to anyone who believes Mr. Little's promises.

I don't suppose he's worried though. There are many born every minute.

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