A true Chihuahua story - specially for Aussies

Did you know Chihuahuas were used to kill snakes? I found out the hard way

Just over 21 years ago I was on my way to make a speech at a posh club in Melbourne. It was a blazing hot summer day.

As I walked through the car park outside the club I saw a little Chihuahua tethered to a car door in all that heat. I felt really sorry for the dog and bent over to pat him (or her – I didn’t stay to find out).

The tiny beast leapt forward and sank his teeth in my brand new trousers, just below the knee. I don’t like to boast, but a couple of inches more and it could have been a lasting personal tragedy.

But enough of that trouser-snake story - which is absolutely true, except the boasting, ladies. It was just an intro to this excellent joke.

Two friends were out for a Saturday walk. One had a Doberman; the other
had a Chihuahua.

As they sauntered down the street, the guy with Doberman
said to his friend, "Let's go over to that bar and get a drink,"

The guy with the Chihuahua said, "we can't go in there. We've got our dogs
with us." The one with the Doberman said, "Just follow my lead."

So, they walked over to the bar and the guy with the Doberman puts on a pair of
dark glasses and starts to walk in.

The bouncer at the door said, "Sorry, Mac, no pets allowed."

The man with the Doberman said, "You don't understand. This is my Guide
Dog,"

The bouncer said, "a Doberman Pinscher?"

The man said, "Yes, they're using them now. They're very good."

The bouncer said, "OK, Come on in."

The buddy with the Chihuahua figured, what the heck, so he put on a pair of
dark glasses and started to walk in. He knew his hound would be more unbelievable.

Once again the bouncer said, "Sorry, pal, no pets allowed."

The man with the Chihuahua said, "You don't understand. This is my guide dog."

The bouncer said, "A Chihuahua?"

The man with the Chihuahua said, "A CHIHUAHUA?!!"

They gave me a f*****g CHIHUAHUA?