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Tuesday, 13 December 2011

Back home, to hail, a leaky roof and a deluge of local government piffle

In New York the sun was shining. In Bristol it was pissing down. And in my flat it was going plonk, plonk, plonk into assorted buckets, bowls and pans.

Only the plants, which needed watering, have escaped.

Meanwhile in a website called London Loves Business it was raining jargon and cliché in the form of an ad from Harrow Council.

With the exception of property ads, recruitment advertising must surely be the worst.

But seriously, could anyone cram much more pretentious bosh into one small space than what follows? And what kind of person will apply? Someone who loves children? Or someone who talks bilge?

Here is the headline to the ad.

LSCB Senior Professional

Gripping, isn't it? It caught my eye because I had no idea what LSCB is. Nor, I bet do you.

More to the point, I suspect that anyone who does is probably divorced from the rest of humanity.

But if the headline was bad, just wait till you read the rest of the complacent self-praising disgraceful guff that follows

Support the groundbreaking new integrated Children’s Service in Harrow through innovative partnership working for the Local Safeguarding Children’s Board (LSCB).

Play your part in a new model

In early 2012, we will launch a brand new operating model for Children’s Services – a radical transformation driven by a complete system re-design. This will be a seamless, fully integrated multi-agency service with one point of contact and a true team around the family. Our visionary approach is based on the firm foundations of evidence, best practice and extensive consultation.

Residents, partners and employees have informed the model’s development every step of the way. Joining us now will give you an important say in the detail and the development of service delivery as we continue on an ambitious journey to become the country’s best performing Children’s Service.

We are looking for an experienced safeguarding professional to work within the Quality Assurance and Service Improvement service to ensure efficient operation of LSCB and sub groups. You will have a key role in ensuring the efficient operation of LSCB meetings, sub groups and time limited task groups.

Look, I don't want to worry you all, but is there any soul in there? Is there any feeling? And how would you feel if your child were being "safeguarded" by people who think and talk like that?

Unfortunately I am time-limited after my flight, so will say no more, except thank you to those who replied to my mention of the joys of EADIM.

I think we now have 13 places left of 40, but I am also brain-limited after the flight, so maybe I've got the numbers wrong.

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