A saint who moves among us. How doth she love herself? Let me count the ways… You might like to light a joint before reading the last bit

What follows is part of a heartfelt message from Rachel Elnaugh, who won fame as founder of Red Letter Day, an internet business that went broke.

She has reinvented herself as a mentor etc., teaching other people what she knows. Self-doubt and modesty are clearly not on her agenda judging by what follows. And judging by what follows that, nor is coherence.

"I am asking you to call on every single person who I have helped over the years to help me out in return."

"All those people whose events I travelled miles to speak at for no fee, the entrepreneurs in moments of dark despair who emailed me, and to whom I sent words of encouragement and support, the people to whom I gave complimentary tickets to come to my events and workshop.  Even invitations to be a guest at the BBQs at my home.  The millions worldwide who have been entertained by Dragons' Den, the tens of thousands in the audiences who gained inspiration and advice from my talks and seminars, the thousands who read my book and found great solace at a difficult time in their life, the hundreds who came to me for free mentoring at The British Library Business Centre.  The testimonials, the endorsements, the promotion and the interviews I gave to help people get publicity for their causes over the years."

I was slightly concerned when she said her latest venture would be far bigger than Red Letter Day, which went broke for a tidy old packet. Anyhow it seems Rachel is involved in something called The Big Om. Here is what that is, in a 138 word paragraph. You can pause for breath whenever you feel like it.

THE BIG OM started as a vision over 30 years ago on a mountainside in New Mexico, a vision of thousands of people celebrating human evolution, chanting the sacred sound of the universe - the OM - together and causing such a powerful vibration, the whole world feels it as an undeniable blast of healing, all backed up in a spectacular display of light and sound by state of the art electronic dance music, the world's finest DJ's, free-runners, tai chi masters, street dancers, gurus and me, Barefoot Doctor, doing the unique shamanic crowd-working, sound-healing experience I've developed over the decades and honed in Ibiza over the past few years, all set in an Ibiza super-club environment, starting at Wembley, London on 12.12.12, as for me, that's the navel of the world and traveling out globally from there.

Wow!